March 28th to April 3rd: Holy Week — The End of the Journey

Reading: August 1 to 30th entries and Afterword, page 208 to 226

Henri died at peace with himself, his family, his own faith community
of L’Arche, his friends, his vocation as a priest, and the God whose
everlasting love had been Henri’s beacon for sixty-four years.
–Nathan Ball, p 226

We come to the end of another Henri Nouwen book discussion. And before we gather again in November for our Advent book discussion, we will have marked the 25th anniversary of Henri’s untimely death on September 21, 1996. Nathan Ball’s concluding words could be Henri’s epitaph for a vibrant life well lived. I’m confident that when Henri met his Lord, he was greeted with the words, “Welcome, my good and faithful servant.”

Many of you have observed and commented on the busy, almost frantic, pace of Henri’s life and his sabbatical year. Sandra went so far as to call it Henri’s not-Sabbatical Journey. There is a great deal of truth in that. I believe, with the benefit of hindsight, it was also a great gift to us all. As Sr. Sue notes in the Foreword,

“Henri meets, celebrates, consoles, counsels, and connects with over a thousand people, and in friendship he mentions six hundred of them by name.” (p. vii)

It is in describing these many encounters that Henri is able to share his life’s wisdom–and to do so in a way that is meaningful to believers and seekers, God’s people, everywhere. Lest we forget, it was also during this year that Henri wrote Bread for the Journey (daily meditations), Can You Drink the Cup (a powerful reflection on living a spiritual life), prepared the Inner Voice of Love (his private journal containing “spiritual imperatives”) for publication, completed a near-final draft of Adam – God’s Beloved, and wrote the reflections that became Sabbatical Journey. Each of these books was informed by Henri’s relationship with his many friends.

Sr. Sue also points out that, unbeknownst to Henri, in his final year he was living out words he himself had written in his book Our Greatest Gift,

“I believe that this lonely task of befriending my death is not simply a task that serves me, but also a task that may serve others. I have lived my whole life with the desire to help others in their journey, but I have always realized that I had little to offer than my own, the journey I am making myself.” (p. xi)

Turning to our reading for this week, I will offer three items for your consideration. The first is the contrast between Henri’s reaction to the Olympic games (August 1st) and the emphasis our world places on competition and winning compared to Jesus saying “Those who lose their life for my sake will find it.” (August 9th). The second is Henri’s question to himself, “Is this my vocation (pastoral care and ministry) or is it better to stay home and write more? (August 26th). And, finally, Henri’s reflections on courage and its relationship to our heart–the center of our being (August 28th). I will also point out that Nathan’s Afterword contains the best description that I have read of Henri’s final days.

As many of you have been doing throughout Lent, please share whatever touched your heart in the readings or your reflections. Once again, I want to thank you for joining to share Henri’s Sabbatical Journey during our Lenten journey. It has been a privilege and a blessing to travel along with each of you–those posting comments and those walking with us silently. We are all on the road to God’s heavenly kingdom and it’s comforting to know we are not alone.

On behalf of the Henri Nouwen Society, may you and yours have a blessed Holy Week and a joyous Easter season.

Peace and all good,
Ray

P.S. Please join us on Wednesday, November 24th when we will begin our Advent book discussion with welcome and introductions. Our Advent book selection will be announced in early-fall.

March 21st to 27th: Lent Week 5 – Adam, Lorenzo, Vacation with Father, Flying With the Rodleighs, and Nathan

Reading: May 19 to July 31 entries, pages 168 to 207

The love of God, neighbor, and self is one love. This great commandment
is a call to the most profound unity, in which God, God’s people,
and we ourselves are part of one love. June 6, p. 179

In our readings this week, as we near the end of our Lent journey, Henri continues to travel extensively, write regularly, meet with friends both old and new, vacation with his father, visit the Flying Rodleighs, and celebrate the Eucharist daily–all while anticipating the end of his sabbatical and his return to L’Arche Daybreak. Henri’s life sounds exciting, fulfilling, and exhausting, as Henri himself readily acknowledges.

But in the entry for July 31 we learn there is more. Henri tells “my best friend” Nathan that he has been plagued by anxiety for the past several month. And then he writes, “I somehow wonder how I am going to survive emotionally.” (p. 207) Perhaps Henri’s frenetic pace and seeming need or desire to be “always in the center of things” is a response to his anxiety and a way for him survive emotionally. This likely took a terrible toll, knowing as we do, that Henri died less than two months later from a massive cardiac arrest. Of course, Henri knew nothing about this. He was planning with his friends “on what to do with our lives between sixty and eighty” (p. 168) and wondering “where we will be and what we will be talking about five years from now.” (p. 204)

As is always the case, there is much to reflect upon in our reading this week. You are invited to comment on whatever touched your heart. Or you may choose to consider one of more of the following excepts that were meaningful to me.

  • In the entry for May 20 (p. 170), in response to Jim’s question about what is most important life, Henri said, “Well, three things: living a vision inspired by the Gospel of Jesus; being close to the poor, the handicapped, the sick, and the dying; and finding a way to satisfy my deep yearning for intimacy and affection.” (Note: Henri’s “three things” answer is typical Henri. He grouped his ideas into groups of three points.) What is most important in your life?
  • On the Feast of the Visitation (May 31st), Henri writes, “I can hardly think about a better way to understand friendship, care, and love than “the way of the visitation.” In a world so full of shame and guilt, we need to visit each other and offer each other a safe place where we can claim our freedom and celebrate our gifts.” (p. 176). How have you experienced the “way of the visitation” in your life?
  • Following a dinner party on July 25th where the influence of politics and religion was discussed, Henri wrote, “For me it is not a question of how we can most influence others. What matters is our vocation. To what or whom are we called? When we make the effect of our work the criterion of our sense of self, we end up very vulnerable. Both the political and ministerial life can be responses to a call. Both too can be ways to acquire power. The final issue is not the result of our work but the obedience to God’s will, as long as we realize that God’s will is the expression of God’s love. (p. 205) How are Henri’s words relevant to the role and influence of politics and religion our world today?

As we have done throughout Lent, you might consider using the process shown below to guide your reflection.

  1. For the journal entries mentioned above or any others that stand out to you, consider:
    1. The experience, thought, or concept that stands out to you
    2. How does it relates to your personal experience?  Look at your experience with the benefit of Henri’s insight.  Does that help you to see things differently or to know yourself better?
    3. What is God speaking to your heart through Henri’s experience and words? How have you been touched, inspired, challenged, and comforted on your spiritual journey.
    4. How you will respond?  Carefully (prayerfully) consider how your heart responds to the insights you gained. Are there small steps you can take to incorporate these insights and to move toward spiritual freedom in your life?  What changes will you make?
  2. Please share your reflection and insights with the group to the degree you are comfortable.

We look forward to another week of fruitful discussions. Be blessed and be well.
Ray

March 14th to 20th: Lent Week 4 – Friendship, Holy Week, and Plans to Return to Daybreak

Reading: March 15 to May 18 entries, pages 127 to 167

This year has been different from my expectations and has been one of the busiest and most involved years I can remember. But still, it’s been a
wonderful year. I did not write as much as I planned, but I wrote
a lot. I did not pray as much as I planned, but my experience
of God has deepened in my writing. I haven’t been as alone
as I hoped, but I’ve had more solitude than before.
(Wednesday, May 15th, p. 166)

We were blessed last week by the personal, touching, and inspired thoughts many of you shared. Several people mentioned they have fallen behind in the reading. Let me assure you, that is not possible in a Henri Nouwen book discussion. I’m confident that the Holy Spirit often guides us to discover what we are supposed to discover at the time we are supposed to discover it. I know that has been the case for me, especially when I read Henri.

During the two months from mid-March to mid-May, Henri is enthused about the book on the Flying Rodleighs; makes progress on the book about Adam; welcomes Nathan, Sue and other friends to Peapack, New Jersey; returns to L’Arche Daybreak to celebrate Holy Week with his community; and then travels seemingly non-stop for a month. Through his sabbatical journal, we gain insights into Henri’s hectic, fulfilling, and, at times, insecure life that we don’t glean from Henri’s other books, as personal as they may be.

When I realized that during last week and this week we are reading Henri’s journal entries twenty five years after they were written on these exact dates (March 7th to March 20th, pages 122 to 131), I was touched and felt a close connection to him. This week, in addition to encouraging you to share whatever touched your heart, I’m going to mention several journal entries and quotations that were especially meaningful to me that may prompt your thoughts.

  • March 15: “When we love God with all our heart, mind, strength, and soul, we cannot do other than love our neighbor, and our very selves. It is by being fully rooted in the heart of God that we are creatively connected with our neighbor as well as with our deepest self.”
  • March 20: “I feel in gentle harmony with my family, the people in Daybreak, especially Nathan and Sue. . . I easily forget how fragile I am inside, and how little is needed to throw me off balance. A small rejection, a slight criticism might be enough to make me doubt my self-worth and even lose my self-confidence.”
  • March 29: This entry of is significant. Henri wrote about the depression caused by the breakdown of a friendship in the The Return of the Prodigal Son and the Inner Voice of Love without mentioning Nathan by name. Not mentioned here, Sr. Sue Mosteller played a key role in healing the relationship.
  • April 29: “Jackie spoke to me about my homily and especially the way I talked about Murray’s vulnerability. ‘I never have thought about being vulnerable as something positive,’ she said. ‘I should have thought about that earlier.'”
  • May 15: The quote in bold at the top of the post.
  • May 17: “What I most hope is to learn how to write a good story that engages the reader to the very end. . . (Mentions books on Adam and Rodleighs) So my trip to Sante Fe is a little gift that I give myself to push me into a new dimension of storytelling.”

As before, you might consider using the process shown below to guide your reflection.

  1. Select a few journal entries that stand out to you, and read them thoroughly, perhaps several times. In your careful reading and reflection, consider:
    1. The experience, thought, or concept that stands out to you
    2. How does it relates to your personal experience?  Look at your experience with the benefit of Henri’s insight.  Does that help you to see things differently or to know yourself better?
    3. What is God speaking to your heart through Henri’s experience and words? How have you been touched, inspired, challenged, and comforted on your spiritual journey.
    4. How you will respond?  Carefully (prayerfully) consider how your heart responds to the insights you gained. Are there small steps you can take to incorporate these insights and to move toward spiritual freedom in your life?  What changes will you make?
  2. Please share your reflection and insights with the group to the degree you are comfortable.

I’m grateful to everyone that has joined us this Lent–those posting comments and those silently sharing our journey. All are welcome here.

May the Lord give you peace.
Ray