Reading: The Path of Waiting (p 87-117)
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Welcome back as we continue our summer journey Finding My Way Home. We have walked together on two of the four paths and have shared much along the way. Thanks to each of you for your participation whether you have been actively commenting or following along silently. Know that your presence is valued.
The theology of weakness (The Path of Power) and the fellowship of the weak (The Path of Peace) point to The Path of Waiting that Henri explores this week. He shows us the way to a life of active waiting with a sense of promise that is based on hope and trust in God. Henri teaches us what it means to actively wait, encourages us to wait in community, and shows us that in our waiting we must be willing “to be handed over” as Jesus was. And we learn that just as we are waiting on God to define our lives, God is waiting on us to choose to follow him. “God became human not only to act among us but also to be the recipient of our responses.” (p 110)
This is a sage, challenging, and rewarding essay. As Henri writes, “The life of Jesus tells us that not to be in control is part of the human condition. His vocation and ours are fulfilled not just in action but also in passion, waiting… If it is true that God in Jesus Christ is waiting for our response to divine love… then we can learn to be obedient people who do not always try to go back to the action but who recognize the fulfillment of our deepest humanity in passion, in waiting.” (p115, 117)
We very much look forward to hearing from each of you this week. Your honest reflections are an encouragement to all who are journeying with us this summer. You may respond to one or more of the questions below or share anything that came up for you in the reading.
1. Henri writes, “A waiting person is someone who is present to the moment, believing that this moment is the moment… Patient living means to live actively in the present and wait there. “(p 97)
a) Have you experienced the active waiting and patient living Henri describes in your life? What was the result?
2. Henri tells the story of Mary and Elizabeth to illustrate the strength of waiting in community. “Christian community is the place where we keep the flame of hope alive among us and take it seriously so that it can grow and become stronger in us. In this way we can live with courage, trusting that there is a spiritual power… that allows us to live in this world without surrendering to the powerful forces constantly seducing us to despair.” (p 103)
a) How do Henri’s insights about waiting in community change your understanding of community? of waiting?
3. In considering active waiting and our world today, Henri asks,” In our world today, how much are we really in control? Isn’t our life in large part passion?” He then writes, “Therefore it becomes increasingly important to recognize that the largest part of our existence involves waiting in the sense of being acted upon.” (p 115)
a) When have you experienced “being handed over” in your life? How did you respond? Would Henri’s teaching lead you to respond differently in the future?
May we have another blessed week of sharing.
It had never occurred to me that Mary and Joseph and Elizabeth and others, before Jesus was born, were practicing a spiritual “waiting” as we do, until Henri Nouwen wrote so eloquently about it. For 25 years at my church I have been involved in so much active service that I’ve been neglecting the “waiting” part. Finally, it all became burdensome and now I am taking a page from St. Francis path and looking to nature (voluntarily caring for the church’s flower beds), keeping a more disciplined prayer life, and particularly caring for the poor (which means doing volunteer work with the elderly in a nursing home close to my home). Henri Nouwen’s spiritual teachings are so meaningful to me, his insights into “coming home” so profound and I know somehow that this well contains “living water.” I look forward to reading more of the book and all the blog entries.
This has been a great discussion. Just started reading “The Cloud of Unknowing” from the 14th Century. This work may have influenced Henri. To share:
“God, the Master of time, never gives the future. He gives only the present, moment by moment, for this is the law of the created order, and God will not contradict himself in his creation. Time is for man, not man for time. God, the Lord of nature, will never anticipate man’s choices which follow one after another in time. Man will not be able to excuse himself at the last judgment, saying to God, ‘You overwhelmed me with the future when I was only capable of living in the present’ ”
This certainly added to my feelings about our topic.
Jerry, thanks for the comments. I have to read that – I might have a copy somewhere, if not, I will order one up. This time issue fascinates me, which ties into the waiting. Time, if you think about it, only exists on this planet. Go offthe planet into the universe, and time no longer exists. And it certainly does not exist for God, who is in all times at all places. Thanks!
Hi Charles I am glad you found it beneficial. My studies in Christian Spirituality have brought me to a new understanding and love of God and my neighbor. It has given me a reason for all the excursions into Eastern religions, meditation and mindfulness. I not only had no idea that Christians ever did this and felt like I was getting further away from the Christian God.
Then I started reading the Mystics. Then Henri, now an unknown Monk from the 14th century, talking with you all and praying in a different way, and it is all coming together. Praise be to God!
I am approaching 78 and this next chapter is very relevant.
Bless you all!!
Jerry
This chapter is very dear to me. Because a friend of mine gave this to me when I was waiting. I have experienced the active waiting. I would say it is knowing that YOU could act, or wish too, or have exhausted all human ways, but choose to wait and see what God will bring instead. It feels like meditating in the moment. Relinquishing to the presence of God in that moment. The result, when I have made the choice, is a peace…a contentment with allowing God to be in the moment and allowing my spirit to rest in Him. I don’t always do this,… but desire to do it more and grateful for seeing the difference. For me, in active waiting I experience His love and grace and trust more fully.
2) “Offering each other a space and support to wait for what we have already seen.” Offering each other space graciously and lovingly …this is true community and when found…is a gift! I have so gratefully found this in my church where others cared for me, knowing and believing in what has been seen….before! … before me and my waiting…where others were waiting and needed support and found so much in the waiting! I did. Because in community we find out that we all are waiting to some degree or more for God to bring us through and having those who remind you of the truths of Who He is in that moment and continues to be can be strengthening. It can transform your whole mindset such that you are forever changed!
3) I have experienced “being handed over” and it was difficult, dark and sad. But I know that in waiting actively I came to know the comfort and love of Christ and a security that I did not have before. “If we were forced to love Jesus and to respond to him only as he ordered, we would not really be lovers.” My love for Jesus has intensified such that He is the one I know can bring me peace. I can be impatient and frustrated in waiting ….or choose to “do”, but He is gracious and will remind me to wait with Him. “It is also participating in God’s own waiting for us and in that way coming to share in the deepest love, which is God’s love.” Waiting for me to allow Him to be all that I need in the waiting, because He is everything I need. So I recognize a new desire to include Him in the waiting. It was very good to reread this!! Grateful for this community and Henri’s writings.
The first time I read this essay, it reminded me of Anthony DeMello, who taught so often about living in the present. I remember him saying that we’re so anxious to leap into the future and avoid the present that we don’t taste the orange we’re eating or see the beauty surrounding us. His books and video presentations made me realize that I was often missing the joys of the present as I catapulted toward the future, and they did help me learn to wait a bit more patiently, but still to the point of being sure I take a book when I go anywhere that might include even the shortest “down” time. Even if I don’t read, knowing I can allows me to wait. Henri’s comments about waiting for a promised blessing, being content that this very moment is the moment to fully experience, and that waiting is active rather than passive because the promise is already unfolding, really stopped me in my tracks. What richness. I had to savor that totally new way of looking at waiting. Once I enlarged my understanding of waiting, I was able to appreciate Henri’s development of being handed over and waiting to be acted upon while having no control over things. I had to read his description of Jesus’ passion and his waiting for his tormentors’ response, and how God waits for our response to his action in our lives, several times to let it sink in deeply. I know, the next time I read the Passion, I will hear it differently.
I often chuckle that God tends to hit me from a couple of different directions (or more) when he’s presenting a new lesson I need to learn. The foot surgery I had nearly a month ago still has me off my feet most of the time. It turned out far more serious than I expected and I’ve really had to work at being patient at the enforced inactivity when so many things need doing. As I pondered this chapter, considering how I’m not very good at waiting, not being in control and especially not good at being acted upon, a friend loaned me a book with the comment that “you MUST read this; it’s great!” It’s Kisses From Katie, by Katie Davis, who at 19 felt the Lord calling her to go work with orphans in Uganda. Now, years later, having adopted 13 orphans herself and being responsible for some 400 more through the foundation she created, she talks about responding to the Lord’s call to leave everything and make her permanent home there, and all the things that have happened that have taught her what trusting in God means and how much it costs – and blesses – step by step as you listen and respond. I then re-read Henri’s chapter. It was as if Katie lives out in day-by-day action everything that Henri discusses. Katie talks about being afraid she’s in over her head, and the Lord teaches her not to be afraid; being overwhelmed by the millions of children dying unnecessarily, and the Lord reminds her that this one, today, is all you need to worry about. She gives up college and a boyfriend she had intended to marry and a pampered life, because whenever she visits her hometown in Tennessee life seems unreal and superficial and shallow because her community, the people who inspire her and teach her what unconditional love is about, all the planting and promises and blessings that Henri writes about – are back in Uganda. Between Henri and Katie, I’ll be reflecting on this chapter for quite a while.
Henri says that “waiting [should mean] believing that this moment is the moment.”
Sometimes appreciating the moment of waiting is clear: feeling the first stirrings of life in a pregnancy or keeping vigil at the bedside of a dying loved one. Sometimes the waiting is excruciating: waiting for the results of a medical test, waiting to find out if I got the job, waiting up for a teenager who just started driving. At such times, life seems suspended, uncertain, out of control.
Our culture likes control. Admittedly, I like control. I like to set goals and take action to get the wheels in motion. I don’t mind the expected setbacks and the need to switch to Plan B or problem-solve along the way. To our culture, passion means not the arduous waiting of the Passion of Jesus but going full throttle to follow our dreams. To many of us, even the gentle Gandhi’s call to “be the change you wish to see in the world” seems action oriented and ambitious.
So these are the questions I have to ask myself: If –really when–I have to face the kinds of overwhelming life-changing challenges that some of you have faced, will I be able to respond with the kind of courage and faith that so many of you have shown? When waiting, what can I do to ensure that my attitude is not one of frustration or dissatisfaction but gratitude for what IS right at the present moment? What can I do to be ever aware that God still loves me despite my imperfections—that I am being given the gift of another day and that even a day of frustrating waiting has infinite value? While waiting, can I remember that I can at least resolve to make one small difference for one person: a fervent prayer for a troubled person’s piece of mind, one act of kindness, one kind word? Maybe that is what gives waiting such power.
Nice writing, Elaine. So true.
When reflecting on Henri’s idea of active waiting with a sense of promise and hope and trust in God, I thought about what renowned biblical scholar N.T. Wright wrote in his recent book Simply Good News–Why the Gospel is News and What Makes it Good.
Wright tells us that the words “good news” (evanggelion in Greek) had a particular meaning at the time of Jesus, usually related to acts of the emperor. “Good news” was first used to announce the victory by the navy of Octavian Caesar over Marc Antony in the Battle of Actium in 31 BC that effectively ended the Roman civil war that followed the assassination of Julius Caesar. A message went to Rome: “Good news! Octavian Caesar has won a great victory!” Wright then goes on to explain what this “good news” meant: Something had happened. (The great victory). Something was going to happen soon. (Octavian would return to Rome and it would be good for his friends and bad for his enemies.) And (this is crucial) for those who are affected by the news, life while waiting (in the present) is different as a result. (Live today, prepare for the future.)
It is not surprising when we recall that the same word–evanggelion translated as “gospel”–is used by Mark to open his book about the life of Jesus. God entered into his creation. Jesus lived, died, and rose again opening the gates of heaven. (Good news if there ever was any.) Jesus will come again, as Wright says, “transforming the whole of creation and raising his people into new, transformed, bodily life.” And, as a result, the world of the Jesus’ disciples then, and our world today now, is forever changed. We are living in the time between “the good news event” (Jesus’ resurrection) and what will happen because of that event. According to Wright, “Because God is going to remake the whole world and raise his people from the dead, they must live in the present in accordance with that ultimate promised destiny. Everything will be different.” This is our challenge every day–to build the kingdom of God on earth by following Jesus.
To use Wright’s words to tie it together: “The good news about what has happened points to the good news about what is yet to happen. And those who find themselves grasped by this double good news also find that their lives between the one and the other (my note: in the present) are utterly transformed as a result.” For me, this is a wonderful description of what Henri means by “active waiting.” And we need to be patient as we wait.
Great treatment of why we should be content to live in the present – and not just exist there but to savor it joyfully. It is said there are no sad saints, but so many of us don’t live as if we know the good news. The last several daily meditations sure tie in well with this post.
Henri always challenges me to see things in new ways. Often in contemplation I am waiting for God. Wanting to feel more peace and love, more stillness. Other times, I want to connect deeply with my love and gratitude to God. So for me the challenge is for us just to be together. Just being and smiling together. Also moving from action to passion reminds me that we can serve others best when we can accept their love and service freely. Often our pride will not allow us to recognize how much we need others in our lives. Not only to share our gifts but to accept theirs gifts. Our humanity relies on relationships which embrace this two way flow of love. Blessing brothers an sisters.
Waiting…powerlessness…peace… This week while waiting for different things to happen, a bit impatiently at times, I’ve tried to remember to “be” in the moment. Also, “doing” helps a bit: praying, and listening.
I had to look up the definition of passion, because while I have heard about Jesus’ passion before, it sounds more like passivity in this context. The word ‘passion’ brings to mind the other definition of the English word, where there is energy, love, decisiveness, etc. To think of Jesus’ passion as being acted upon in waiting is new to me. Yet encouraging to see how God is in the moments when we have no choice but to wait for Him.
Hi, I am back again. Have enjoyed reading other peoples sharings. Before I was appointed to Ecuador the sisters in our congregation told me I needed to have lots of patience because I would experience lots of queues. Indeed that has been the case. But if “a wait” is expected I can make the waiting part of the process, live the moment( chat with people in the queue, read a good book or enjoy some quiet reflection). It is when the wait is not expected (in heavy traffic for example) that I can begin to feel impatient. It’s then that I say sorry to the Lord because he gave me the opportunity to practise patience and I flunked it. I was also reflecting of how in life we sometimes have long waits and that the longer the wait the greater the joy at the other end. It made me think of Elizabeth, how she was well on in years before she had a son. When we are out in Ecuador we are allowed home every two years and the excitement I feel when its time to come home is strong. It lead me to think about our other sisters in the past who would sometimes have to wait 7, 12 or 15 years. Wow!!! They must have been feeling over the moon. Then I went on to reflect about the phrase “being acted upon” and that reminded me of anew Parish Priest (in Ecuador) that arrived. Before his arrival I was heavily involved in the parish: Co-ordinator of catechism, formator of the altar servers, sacristan, parish secretary ect ect. All these resposibilities were taken away from me. His way of working was very different to ours (we are two sisters in community) and so soon we found ourselves very much on the periphery of the parish. We put up a good fight with meetings and frequent visits to the Bishop. In the end we felt that God was calling us to just accept it, just as Jesus accepted his passion. I had been moved from centre stage to back stage (like Henri, from Harvard to L’Arche). If a theatre production is going to take place, both are needed, back stage workers and those on the centre stage. It is the same in God’s Vineyard. The acceptance of the situation brought me peace. It also reminded me that I am loved by God for who I am and not for what I do. Another fruit that came out of this dilema was that our house (and small chapel) became a centre for groups that we were involved in. New life has been brought to our house and our smalll community of two has been extended. God brings good out of every situation if we allow him to and are patient.
What an inspiring post! I take a couple of days to reflect before I put thoughts on paper, and your post has galvanized my thoughts. Been there, done that – but not nearly as well as you, and not with patience. Thanks so much.
My response to your wonderful post was very similar to Cel’s. Thanks so much for sharing. I distinctly remember a Sunday homily at Mass many years ago while we were on a family vacation at the beach on the Outer Banks of North Carolina. The church building was sized for their year-round residents and during the summertime they placed loudspeakers outside to accommodate the overflow crowds. It was a beautiful, sunny morning and the celebrant was a visiting priest from the West Indies or a similar location. And in a lilting accent he said, “God takes his time in doing his own thing, and we are impatient.” So true. And your reminder that “God brings good out of every situation if we allow him to and are patient.” is timeless and important advice. Thanks again.
It was so interesting to read your comments Sallie because I had a restless night thinking about Henri and Adam. I apologize for perhaps going backward in our study. I had an embarrasing and very unlike Henri episode with my daughter at an amusement park yesterday. My daughter, however, has no special needs but Henri is is relevant in all relationships. The day ended with her being annoyed that she didn’t get something she wanted and wouldn’t be able to b/c she had already departed the park. It was a tipping point for me and I became consumed with seeing her as someone with limitless wants, expectations, and dissapointments. It also came at the end of several weeks of her getting so many things that i thought I would have a reprieve from her wants. While Adam couldn’t verbalize as my daughter can, Henri never ever had a reprieve from Adam’s wants/needs, nor does it appear that he was “owed” one, as I now see I believed about myself. I don’t know where Henri found his capacity for unconditional love, acceptance, and understanding. I know it was not available to me yesterday.
As I think of this topic that Henri Nouwen writes about, I am reminded of the times I have waited for direction in my life, the results have always been meaningful. This has been in both my personal life and professional.
I also believe that it is in the present moment that God speaks to us. As Jesus reflected in the unfolding of his passion, and waited, that he was given strength to follow what God’s will was for his life.
Ray was definitely correct, this was an interesting and very challenging chapter in this book.
Two things really struck me. First, as I was reading Henri Nouwen’s thoughts on waiting, I was reminded of the Buddhist notion of mindfulness, the idea of living in the moment, and appreciating the moment for what it is. In that sense, our waiting is no longer a burden, but it becomes part of our living, and part of our becoming further connected with God.
By the way, I was also intrigued by the examples Henri Nouwen used from the Bible. The character of Simeon has always intrigued me. He waited his entire life to see the Messiah. He finally did in Jesus. There was purpose in his waiting. In fact, once he saw Jesus, he saw his life as complete. His waiting led him to a completely fulfilled life. Each night I try to say the Night Prayer in the Liturgy of the Hours, although I must confess I am less than consistent. That being said, I will at least think about the first line of the Canticle of Simeon. “Lord, now you let your servant go in peace.”
And that brings me to, for me, the most significant part of this chapter when Henri Nouwen speaks of his sick friend, and then relates the writings of V.H. Vanstone. This was my “aha” moment of the book, my own epiphany. We all have a vocation. That vocation is not fulfilled only in what we do, but in our waiting as well, when things are done to us, or things are happening out of our control. As Henri Nouwen relates, the vocation of Jesus was fulfilled not only by his ministry, but by His passion, by this allowing others to do things to him after he was handed over. That was His waiting. Henri Nouwen summed it up well when he said that a large part of our existence is waiting, when we are being acted upon. Not to be in control is part of the human condition. Our vocations are fulfilled not just in action, but in waiting (pg. 117 in my copy). This hit me like a load of bricks. Especially since I, like many of you, are always on the go, always doing something, hardly ever stopping. I am not running from anything, I just want to do a lot of things and run out of time! Eventually I will have to slow down, and probably stop everything in the end. At least now I know that when it happens, it is part of my vocation as well.
By the way, just as an aside, I thought Henri Nouwen in this chapter gave me the best reason yet to be reading the Bible! He speaks of the Word, when it comes, becoming flesh in us. He said “[w]e read the Word so that the Word can become flesh and have a whole new life in us.” That statement was phenomenal. I never heard a reason for reading the Bible said better than that.
Nice insights, Charles. Thanks.
I remember Henri said in one of his writing that “everything that could be done to him had been done to him” He was speaking of the passive nature of discipleship, using Jesus acceptance of rejection as a prime example. Waiting for understanding, new life, and contemplative inner peace of waiting as an active part of discipleship is not easy. I have a daughter who I was extremely close to who has not spoken to me for ten years because I could not pay for her college education despite countless attempts at reconciliation on my part. Despair which was once a major part in my experience,has lessened and I no longer live in it, yet I still wait for a hoped for(prayed for) opportunity to just see her. I understand Nouwen to accept this pain as part of the unique person I am. I see it as a part of the community of all who wait be it for fulfillment or future peace and a deeper connection to God as they wait. I fill a spiritual connection to Marianne who suffers (migraines Chemo). My mother had constant migraines and waited for relief for years(that did not come) yet maintained a life of faith even through suffering.
Dear David – You came to mind as I read pages 98 P 1 “There is more. Waiting is also….” page 99 P 2 – P 101. ” I have found it…” (not sure if we have the same pages but it is within this week’s reading.) We walk a similar path of waiting, David, as I am too estranged from my children. Mine is not a complete estrangement but I find myself waiting and wondering if there will be a next time. Family time is very very limited to a short visit on some holidays. Beautiful grandchildren that barely know who I am. I blame it on lack of funds because I raised my children on my own. Too hard, too long and too lonely so I was often angry after returning to them from work. I needed to reply completely on the arms of God but I was too fearful back then to accept that “I am beloved”. So I know some the heartache of estrangement you live. It is very challenging in this situation to believe that God holds us in tenderness, as his beloved, when our hearts feel ripped out of our chest. But it is true. So waiting. Why is this waiting different. Children waiting for Christmas morning fun or Easter egg fun know that it is going to happen. They are powerless but they know that it will happen (thanks to parents). They are not “afraid” that the festivities will not happen. They have no control and yet they anticipate with joy. I have limited control, if any, about my adult children, but why can’t I look into the future with great anticipation? Perhaps getting into the moment as Henri Nouwen explains. I think about the five people who are “waiting” at the beginning of the chapter for this week. We are reading it from hindsight. But in their waiting period, they did not know what would happen. This reading has both given me ideas to ponder and a kindred parent (you) to remember in my prayers. Kind regards to you and your family.
Thank you. I am waiting for something different. I am waiting for a response to a heartfelt apology and confession that I recently made to my brother. I was uncharitable in my words, and that could estrange us from one another. Once they were out there I felt terrible and I realized that I was wrong. I have written and told him so, asked for his forgiveness, and now I wait…………………….
Dear Lori,Thanks for your response.The nature of waiting to see ones children causes a unique pain. I have learned to let it move past my heart over the years rather then allowing it to dominate my life. Serving others as a pastor for 40 yrs (now retired) helped me deal with my own pain , Nouwen found community-family-meaning at L’arche yet on one occasion his need for personal affection involved being held in Therapy. My children who were my joy are now my memory even my pain.(I have tried to reconcile with one and the others live far away) The Mass and the Rosary have been a great comfort to me.( I feel held by God through these spiritual experience and Sacraments) Nouwen celabrated the Mass almost every day I believe. Thanks again for sharing your journey and for all others who share the great comfort of Henri Nouwen. David
I used to be a Type A doer but Chronic Migraines and now Breast Cancer made me redefine if I was still useful or not. There is lots of waiting with the diagnosis of Cancer. Right now, I am waiting to heal enough to go back to work. One medication for Cancer has caused an increase in the amount of migraines I have, so I’m waiting for med changes to take effect. I must say, I really needed to have this chapter come up right now.
I am an RN and I reconciled my usefulness as a person by remembering a person whom I looked after with MS. She was unable to move anything but her head. She had a soft call bell that was like a soft ball which she could use to call us nurses if she needed anything. I noticed that I did not regard this person as useless even though she could only move her head.
I also realize that waiting in community is the best way to wait. I have a good blog that my closest friends respond to me on with lots of encouragement while I am healing from the Chemo and radiation.
My Husband and I still have not started a small group which was my “take home” from one of the last book studies, but we are both feeling a need to make a home for some Christian Community.
Marianne,
May you experience the presence of the Lord and the comfort of this and your other communities in your waiting and my your healing be swift and complete. .
Ray
I just wanted to say thank you to each of you sharing on this blog and to others, like me, who are mostly just listening and being fed by your insights.
During our Lenten discussion, after my initial hesitancy in blogging, I was able to share and participate at a much higher level. I am sorry that I am not there this time around, but I am very grateful to those of you who are sharing…I am truly being fed.
To every thing there is a season, for me right now, it Is enough to listen and be fed by my brothers and sisters. Thanks again.
Joni,
Thanks for sharing that you are present in our community during this season. You strengthen the body of seekers learning from each other.
Ray
From Elaine
I apologize for the late response to last week’s discussion. I did not have access to internet for several days but would like to weigh in on the topic now.
Like many of you, I am a doer, a Martha, a Type A personality, a list maker. I am keenly aware of the struggle to keep my own accomplishments in perspective, to be totally present to others, and to see periods of inaction as opportunities to hear the voice of God. I am totally in awe of Henri Nouwen, who had the courage to surrender a life of intellectual achievement for selfless commitment to members of the L’Arche community. The message of “The Path of Peace” is challenging for me, but I do get it.
I would posit, however, that we doers can also view our wiring as a potential gift from God. For example, despite getting on in years, I still have boundless energy, a great work ethic, and good organizational skills. I have long been the go-to girl for many projects in the church and other organizations. As long as my motivation for “doing” is not driven by the desire for praise or self-satisfaction, I feel responsible for using these gifts in the service of others. The world has so many needs. However, I had better guard against becoming, as Henri say, the “self-sufficient star,” and I had better regard these gifts as blessed, unearned graces from God.
We doers might take our cues from Richard Rohr’s philosophy of action and contemplation. Before we act, we should contemplate our motive and our mission: What is God calling me to do? How will my actions further the kingdom of God on earth? Then while we act and after we act, we must circle back to contemplation: Has my motivation shifted toward self-service or self-aggrandizement? Have I been so obsessed with busy-ness that I have lost the joy of the moment, gratitude for that meal I just gulped down on the run, appreciation for the health and mental capacity that permitted me to act in the first place?
For the doers in our group, I recommend Doris Donnelly’s beatitudes-based examination of conscience where she poses questions such as these: Are my energies and passions focused on Christ, or are they scattered, disordered, divided? Do I deflect the attention and honor due to God and claim these things for myself? Is my presence a source of peace to those around me?
I look forward to further discussions of how to find the doing/being balance in my life. Thanks to all of you for helping me to find my way home.
Thanks Elaine. No apology ever needed here for the timing of any response. Everyone replies in their own time or, perhaps, in the fullness of time (or when their Internet service returns 🙂 )
I, too, and a doer and I know enough about myself to realize that, at times, my motivation certainly has been the desire for praise or self-satisfaction. Yet, I also know that when “doing” the right things (e.g., leading a Confirmation small group with my wife) I experience the joy of the presence of the Lord. Your reference to Rohr’s Contemplation and Action is helpful to me.
May the Lord give us all peace and help us find our way.
Ray
Elaine and Ray, your comments remind me of our discussion just last week at our Bible study where we looked at the readings coming up, coincidentally for today, Sunday, July 19, 2015. The Gospel was Mark 6:30-34. This is after Jesus sent out the Apostles, pairs, and they then return. Check it out, it addresses much of what you mention in your posts. Anyway, at the Bible study I raised the observation that Jesus recognized that after intense labors the Apostles needed to be refreshed in His presence and in their fellowship. “To be with him” is a requirement of fruitful apostleship that must constantly be renewed. He mentions taking them to a “deserted place” that recalls a place of solitude and retreat where one withdraws to be with God. Jesus here recognizes the practical physical needs of those who spend time in his service. So, to get to my point, there is a lesson here for us. The temptation of those of us who continue the Mission of Christ is that we can easily get caught up in the business of the ministry so that we repeatedly ignore the need for prayer, rest, and stillness in God’s presence. Then it becomes easy to imperceptibly begin to substitute our own agenda for that of Jesus. Authentic Christian ministry is rooted in prayer, as apart from Him we can do nothing.
Hi Charles and other friends. We too discussed same text in session following the service. One version we read was “The Message” In that version it says “At the sight of them, his heart broke.” So vivid. We also discussed the need for rest , his compassion, but at the same time readiness to be there for those who needed him.
I think this story shows the human and the divine side(edge of his robe healed.)
It ties in with Henri’s idea of waiting to be acted upon.
Eastern philosophies have taught “mindfulness” for generations. You can’t change yesterday or do anything about tomorrow. You have only the moment. Live it in mindfulness of every step.
Great discussion
From Sallie
Hello this is Sallie and it is my first blog! I have for 23 years journeyed with my daughter who is autistic and I can imagine Henri in his struggles and how L’Arche brought him a sense of ‘being’. Over the years I have experienced highs and lows. However, my daughter Charlotte who despite her struggles, seems to have gone with the flow. She is so in tune with who ‘she is’ as a person and how happy she is with the person she has become. She doesn’t yearn to be different, to change or to be like anyone else. She is happy to ‘be’ Charlotte. How contrary to me! Who is always trying to be better and perfect myself in whatever way I can, beating myself up when I fail and always looking for improvement, as if ‘half ok’ is not good enough! Charlotte doesn’t see life this way at all! She is happy with the simplest of tasks she achieves in her day. She has moved from one place to another and has never been defeated by the challenges. I have learned more from her over the years than she ever has ever learned from me and I am so grateful she is part of my life and our family life. I have so enjoyed Henri Nouwen’s books that brought comfort to me during my hardest moments. God truly works in wonderful ways and brings the most amazing people into our lives that touch us in a remarkable way and help us become the people God wants us to be. Charlotte is in a loving home similar to L’Arche and it is full of the most amazing people of all different ages, but this doesn’t seem to matter. They may not always see eye to eye but somehow, they understand one another. They understand one another’s most vulnerable needs ‘at heart level’. They seem to ‘read’ one another as if they have their own particular communication skill that only they can understand. For instance I sometimes find one particular resident difficult to understand, .but Charlotte will immediately understand perfectly what they are trying to say. Despite her apparent disabilities to the world, she has profound abilities, as do each one of the people living there. As Henri said ‘Peace is a gift from God often hidden from the wise and wealthy and revealed to those who feel empty, inarticulate and poor’. So true. Sorry a long blog ..apologies if I have rambled! Still trying to perfect myself!! I am so enjoying reading the blogs and the wonderful book, blessings to all. I look forward to the next chapter!
Welcome Sallie! It’s great to hear from you and to know you are journeying with us. Thank you for sharing the loving story of you and your wonderful daughter. We look forward to your continued participation — and no apologies are ever needed here for sharing what is on your heart. Thanks again.
Ray